YEA OR NAY FOR MAY 2ND

This is not how it was supposed to happen! It just goes to show what happens when I draft a scumbag Yankee.

Phil Hughes, the darling of Columbus, has been a colossal bust in the bigs. Bring up all you want the game last year when Hughes had a no hitter going and then had to leave with an injury. But the guy who could have been the central piece for Johan Santana isn’t worth trading for Rafael Santana right now.

Hughes is now out until July with a broken rib. Last year, it was a hamstring that shut him down for a couple months. Yankee fans need to be shaking in their boots that they don’t have the next Rich Harden in their midst.

Hughes’ 6 starts this year were mortifying. 22 innings, 22 earned runs. 1 quality start, his first of the year.

Last year, Hughes made 13 starts and you know what I found out? HE WAS PRETTY CRUMMY THEN TOO! 36 earned runs in 72 innings pitched. Just 5 quality starts. 29 walks compared to 58 strikeouts. Pro-rate those walks over a full season (if he ever makes it through one) and you’re looking at close to 90 walks!

Hughes is just another prime example of the Yankee hype machine. Nobody is better at it than New York. It would just be nice if the rest of the league would finally wake up and get a clue.

Thanks for nothing, you overrated wannabe.

On to the Yea or Nay….I’m pretty riled up, so expect a lot of nays this week.

YEA: To Tampa, Oakland and the White Sox, your three division leaders in the American League as of May the second. Last year, these three teams combined to go 214-272, a combined 58 games under .500. As a Red Sox fan, Tampa legitimately has me worried, because their pitching is out of sight. And their ace, Scott Kazmir, has yet to even pitch.

NAY: To the Red Sox. 4 runs in their past 5 games. Getting shutout twice in a week. I know that despite this offensive drought they have won 2 of 5, but goodness do they look flat.

YEA: To Howie Kendrick. My pal Howie was supposed to come off the disabled list this past Tuesday. Well, it’s Friday and the Angels are now saying he isn’t even ready to go out on a rehab assignment. My hatred of you is 100 percent justified. It will be a cold day in Hades before I even consider having you on my team.

If you are the G.M., at what point do you just say ‘Dude, get your ass on the field!’

NAY: To the BCS. The powers that be decided this week that an NCAA football playoff isn’t in their best interest and the next time the idea could even possibly be revisited will be 2014. Instead, we are stuck with a mind numbing 34 bowl games this coming year. Think about it….68 teams will be participating in bowls this year. With the rule being that you need to be at or above .500 to qualify for a bowl, isn’t the day coming when there just aren’t enough teams that will reach that benchmark?

NAY: To all the dudity at the YMCA. I joined a couple months back and I just can’t get over all the male nakedness. I can understand if you want to take a shower at the gym. I’m all for hygiene and smelling nice for the gals at the senior center.

But what is it that makes these old wrinkly guys want to walk around the locker room flapping in the breeze? You have a towel in your hand!!! Don’t you realize you can wrap it around yourself and not subject me to your twigs and berries!!

And it’s almost always the 95 year old guy who is doing this. The guy who was around when the Y was invented. God bless you for getting out and being active at your age. I hope you live to be 130. BUT I DON’T WANT TO SEE YOUR PEANUTS!!!

YEA: To this guy here. I had this idea when I was 8, but never had the guts to try it.

YEA: To the Phillies bullpen. The reason the team is in first place in the East is not the offense, it’s the bullpen. Consider these numbers: Brad Lidge-13 IP, 0 Runs. Tom Gordon-(since his day one meltdown) 11 IP, 2 Runs. JC Romero-12.6 IP, 0 Runs. Rudy Seanez-10 IP, 1 Run.

Everyone was ready to run Gordo out of town after losing on opening day, but he has come around nicely. I can’t say it will be this way all year, but right now, the Phils are in lockdown if they head to the 7th with a lead.

NAY: To Troy Tulowitzki. First you don’t hit a lick for the opening month. Then you tear a quad. Needless to say, I own Troy in numerous leagues. Personally, I think he’s a faker.

YEA: To Ryan Braun. I told you to be patient and he’s starting to turn it up. I traded for him on Monday and since he has gone 7 for 13 with a home run and 7 RBI. Hooray me!

NAY: To the 76ers. Another prediction of mine come true. The Sixers stood up to the big bad Pistons, but eventually were rebuffed. Regardless of the outcome, you have to call this a good year. The team finally returned to the playoffs and young guys like Thaddeus Young, Rodney Carney and Louis Williams all look like players.

A couple notes before the Sixers head off into the sunset.

What to do with Andre Iguodola? The dude did not help himself in these playoffs. He’s talking like he wants a max contract, but can you really give all that money to a guy who averaged you 13 points in the playoffs? He’s only 24, so there actually could be room for him to improve. The team has a nice core of players. The Sixers have a lot of money to spend. I’m really torn on what they should do.

Second, I want to know how I can become Louis Amundson. In case you were unaware, Louis is a 76er. He’s a first year power forward out of UNLV, who appeared in 16 games this season. If you are a masochist and watched the entire game last night, Louis is the goofy white guy with the long brown hair tied up in a pony tail.

The reason I want to be him is this. Louis played in 16 games this year for a grand total of 63 minutes. Louis scored 18 points, grabbed 12 rebounds and committed 13 fouls. Louis earned $687,000 for this effort.

Consider that Louis played 22 of his minutes in two games in late November. That means that over the entire rest of the season, he ran up and down the court for a total of 41 minutes. I think I can do that.

I also think I could luck into a couple rebounds and I know I could commit 13 fouls. I also know I could do that for a lot less than $687,000. I could save the Sixers a cool half a million bucks. Throw $100,000 my way. Spend the money on better players and maybe I could even get myself a ring. I’m unselfish like that.

NAY: To JJ Putz. I don’t care what you say, something isn’t right with the dude. I had JJ last year and it was glorious. But this year, he hasn’t been the same. Consider that since he has come back from injury he has appeared in three games. He converted the first save, but has given up 5 runs in his next two appearances. The biggest worry would be the walks he is surrendering. He’s walked 5 guys in his last 3 innings. In all of 2007, Putz walked just 13 batters. You might want to consider selling while he still has most of his value.

YEA: To Carlos Beltran. Carlos celebrated his 31st birthday the other night, closing down a popular Spanish restaurant for the private affair. Attending the shindig in downtown Manhattan were fellow Mets JOSE REYES, CARLOS DELGADO, OLIVER PEREZ, SANDY ALOMAR JR., JOHAN SANTANA, ENDY CHAVEZ AND DAVID WRIGHT. Which of these is not like the other?

I have a feeling Wright was only invited to make sure there was someone there who would be able to hail a cab at the end of the night.

NAY: To Billy Ray Cyrus for answering Roger Clemens’ phone call. Bad parent.

YEA: To Jack Cust. I’m not a fan, please don’t place that label on me. But the fact of the matter is that there isn’t a single human being on this earth who is streakier than Jack Cust. And Cust is 7 for his last 14. Get ready.

NAY: To Nick Adenhart. It was good seeing you.

YEA: To the Mariners for finally wising up and promoting Jeff Clement and Wladimir Balentien. Both these young guys can smoke the ball and Kenji Johjima and Jose Vidro are stinking up the joint. Gutsy move releasing Brad Wilkerson outright, but this team needed to be shaken up. They are playing well below their capabilities.

NAY: To every starting pitcher not named Johan Santana who will be a free agent in the next two years. Barry Zito has officially screwed you over. Teams were leery of giving out massive contracts to pitchers before the Zito fiasco. Now, with the revelation that Zito can’t even reach 90 mph on the radar gun anymore, GM’s will be even more reluctant to hand out 100 million to free agent moundsmen.

Do you think the Giants will pick up his $18 million option for 2014?

YEA: To the Kentucky Derby. Trifecta: Big Brown-Denis of Cork-Pyro. Thank me later. Go make some money.